Chattering again post first submission.

The new front of Birmigham New Street Station

This is me starting up after submitting my thesis.

In many ways the weeks have not had very much going on in them. I worked Monday to Thursday, shopped Friday morning and normally slept some of Friday afternoon, then sat down on the evening and the rest of the weekend to get on with thesis. the only real diversion has been writers group on a Monday evening and towards the end I was not even finding the energy to write a piece for that, the last piece I took was a haiku and yes it did only have seventeen syllables. If you want to know more how how my thesis progressed it is on the blog http://jengiethesis.blogspot.co.uk/ .

Let me say here now quite clearly, if you have not submitted a doctorate you do not know how intense that last run up to submission is. I say this as someone who had talked several people through it, had read quite a few books and has quite a good imagination and I  UNDERESTIMATED IT. I went through the anal retentive. I went through the stage when it took over my brain. In the end it was just a matter of keeping focussed on what I was doing. I allowed nothing to come between me and finishing. I suspect, although I do not know, that it is a similar type of focussed effort as that of a top athlete.

Work has been busy as well. I have done a lot of teaching. At some stage I will add up how much but for about ten weeks I had at least a class a week and sometimes two. Classes last 2.5 hours which is longer than most. I have stopped having feedback forms, I suspect people think it is arrogance but I  do not think that I teach perfectly, I just think that I know at the end of the class whether I have succeeded or not. There are occassions when I walk out of the class on a high. If I do that then quite often I get unsolicited feedback telling me how marvellous it was, when I go out of a class feeling I have failed I get told how useless it was. It is not the material I teach, that remains the same, it is the ability to engage the class with the material.There are a number of things that change this. Sometimes it is simply how tired I am, other times it is whether I have had enough preparation time, how fresh the course is, how warm the classroom is or whether the technology works.

This is going to be short I realise as I am actually not really into writing at length at present. Indeed if you had asked me before I finished what I would have done after my thesis was submitted I think I would have said read some light fiction which has nothing to do with thesis. However it has come clear over the last few days that at this stage there are three things I find I want to do.  The first is to exercise until I am physically tired, I suspect that this is in the hope that if I am physically tired as well as mentally then my body will not keep my brain awake but I suspect there is more. Then there is getting out of Sheffield into the countryside and the wilder the better. The orderly detail of towns and cities is too much like the regimented process of getting my thesis ready to submit. Finally I have found that the one task I settled to with some relish is redesigning my website. It has needed doing for two years but on Friday which was not a good day, redesigning it was all that I felt up to doing.

Reporting on the last couple of months

Dear All

I am final writing another chattering. I am afraid until my thesis is finished they will be intermittent as it will depend on me having some time to spare to write a letter. As you might have gathered, if you follow my thesis blog, I ended with more editing on my thesis than I expected. The thing being that a major restructuring was required. This was not the dire news it could have been, I already had the feeling that the thesis though written just did not cling together. So the whole of October was spent firstly regrouping and reorganising my thesis, then starting to edit the chapters again. I have redrafted two chapters and am on the way with a third. There really is more on my thesis blog.

Otherwise work has been busy. I found myself carrying more and more tasks in work. I have been trying to keep on top on NVivo training that the University of Sheffield asks. I am afraid that I am not finding enough time to do this as I would like. I am not sure I will ever be able to meet the demand and I seem to become an expert by virtue of nobody else being willing to tackle it. I seriously question whether this is the right way to tackle it.

I am also keeping up with the work from Human Nutrition, this year we are hoping to do some research on Food Banks particularly with respect to the fact that the increase has been exponential in the last year. It is to try and discover how food bank provision is seen by the people who use them. The work I have been involved has shown that homeless people have aspirations to a better diet but the need to get the calories in trumps that. However there is also a culture around food and that can lead to provision being, “unhealthy”, in that the easy improvements would be unpopular with users.

There is also work around sustainability. I am also developing a close cooperation with the department of Linguistics, this is slow but sure. Perhaps one of the more unusual applications of statistics although I know there has been people applying these techniques to the authorship of Paul forever! However the number of statisticians that have actually been involved is low and there is a tendency to use sophisticated techniques when people have not understood simpler ones. There is now a seminar running and a group of about four researchers I see regularly. The final group is a number of researchers from Landscape and Architecture.

Many of them are doing quite complex work and often around the same themes. I have had to refer one of the Architecture students to landscape as what she was doing was very similar to Landscape work in approach although in a different area. Her own department tackled similar issues but took a different approach.

At the end of October my writers group had its annual reading as part of Off the Shelf .It was a good evening and the reviews we got from it were good. I think the fact that we had a reading in the summer helped as we were all up to performing. For some reasons, the fact that I supplied a portable sound system meant that people projected their voice better. The sound system was there but many did not use it. I also think we set the standard higher each year. This showed with the amount of effort we put into choosing the pieces to read. We used to accept what people brought but now Neil (our tutor) starts it with giving instructions on what makes a good piece to read and more attention in the rehearsal is given to the suitability of pieces.

On the Sunday before I got away on holiday my loo valve decided to leak water into the cistern. This meant I had to get a plumber out. In the end I found a firm called Aquagas who came out. They not only stopped the leaking that evening, over the next couple of days the plumber came out several times to get the loo working properly. Due to a lot of misadventures he ended up replacing the innards twice (everything decided to go) and in the end given the time and energy he spent on it, the charge was very reasonable. He kept going until he got it right.

The holiday was supposed to be the one for after submission. In some ways there was a real temptation to not go on holiday as I needed to write; however it was increasingly obvious that I was very tired and that I struggling to keep going. In other words even though I had not submitted I needed a break.I went up to stay in a cottage owned by the person who I have B&B with when I was visiting my God-family. My God-family is no longer there and anyway it was obvious from New Year I would near more space to myself. The cottage I booked was the Auld Smiddy. It is a really well equipped cottage. There was a slight problem with the central heating, nothing that I could not handle. The owner went away at the weekend, and I worked out even if it went completely there was no problem. There was an electric shower, kettle, modern wood fire, two electric heater and a paraffin heater. So without it I would be warm and able to wash. The kitchen was better  equipped than my own at home. There was a sun porch that looked over the fields past another cottage and over the sea to the Isle of Mann. During the week apart from crows and blackbirds that were there every day, I saw in the field: a fox, several rabbits, roe deer, sparrow hawks and a flock of redwings.

Port Patrick

Further a field there was pretty good birding, saw barnacle geese, a red kite, an egret, mergansers, pochards and kestrels. These are just the ones I could recall. I actually found that one of the reasons I liked birding was that I liked the reason to be out in the spaces that it took me to which were wilder than you would think of if you were just touring the area. The places I found were Crook of Baldoon , Wigtown Bird Hides which are down by the Harbour in Wigtown and look out over Wigtown Bay Reserve and finally North of Stranraer I found Wig Bay (that is the best link I can find ) which is World War II causeway that runs by the edge of the bay and gives views of the birds feeding at the sea edge. The wider view is not spectacular as it looks over to Stranraer and Cairnryan. Coffee is available at Soleburn Garden Centre . I also walked for a bit along the cliffs at Port Patrick but there were mainly gulls to see and I am no good at identifying gulls.

I found having a real fire was good. It was not just that it made the cottage lovely and warm but that as I reset it every morning I always knew that I had that to come back to in an evening and look forward to.  I am not sure whether I would feel the same if I had one at home but on holiday with long dark evening it made something to look forward to. I therefore did a lot of reading, not for thesis but books that had been on my to read list for far too long. Only one finished but I did start a second and found one left by another visitor called Skyward by Mary Alice Munroe. It is light, it is fairly predictable but it was enough to get me hooked into the story so that I went and bought it on Kindle when I got home so I could finish it. Unfortunately the storyline I was really interested in was not well concluded but there was still plenty to entertain.

I came back this last week and have been picking up the pieces of normal life in Sheffield. So far I seem to have more energy